21 questions

Dear God,

It’s me again.

I’m tempted to ask “how are you?” but I think I know the answer. You’re seated on your throne, basking in your magnificence, seeing to the affairs of men and revelling in their praises.

I’ve been thinking about you a lot these past days.

No, that’s untrue!

I’ve been thinking about you a lot all my life. I’ve heard so many mindblowing things about you, I’ve read even more from the holy book. I see all you do for me, how you take perfect care of me. I feel you around me, how you envelope me with your love.

But the more I learn about you, the more curious I get. I want to ask questions but the way our church is set up? We don’t get to do that; at least not during Sunday services.

The older I get, the deeper our love affair. It’s why I can look to you, stretch out my arms and attempt to feel your face as I pour out my heart to you. I summed up the entirety of my curiosity in 21 questions. All my whys, whens, hows and whats in the simplest words. So, here goes:

1. Why am I here, on earth?

2. Why did you allow coronavirus?

3. You know I’m fed up with being broke. At what point do I really become wealthy?

4. My mother lost all those pregnancies. Why am I the only one who survived? There’s got to be an explanation.

5. Do I really have to be a Christian to continue to have a relationship with you?

6. What are your plans for Nigeria? It’s a ghetto out here.

7. How has my grandpa fared in the last 10 years since he joined you?

8. Some people claim you don’t exist. How does this make you feel?

9. I’ve not paid my tithes in a while. Have I truly messed up or these pastors are exaggerating?

10. Am I imagining our relationship? I’m asking because I’m a sinner yet I feel you here so strongly.

11. You know I’ve sort of given up on getting married. Should I still look forward or it’s never happening?

12. That said, how about those six children I’ve talked to you about having? When should I expect them?

13. I think about the story of the four Hebrew boys a lot and I wonder what became of them after the fiery furnace episode. Is there a concluding part?

14. How can I truly please you?

15. What are your thoughts on equal rights for women?

16. I don’t understand what the deal is with many religious leaders in Nigeria. Do you?

17. You see and know everything. How do you stay calm when terrorists attack cities and kill hundreds of people? I’m particularly concerned about SARS in Nigeria. How much longer do they have?

18. The concept of going to church every Sunday baffles me? Does it count for anything with you?

19. You know I like to talk to you about boys and there’s this one. What’s up with him?

20. This is not a question. I just wanted to quickly slip in a ‘thank you’ for everything.

21. God, when?

I guess the rest of my life will be about you unraveling these mysteries in parts. I look forward to hearing from you everyday.

Your best girl,

Tolu’lope

***This is my seventh and unarguably most heartfelt letter yet. I hope you can relate to some of the questions. I hope you enjoyed reading them. Please share your thoughts in the comments as usual.

And we can take it a step further. If you have any questions for God, please share them with me as I have shared mine with you. You have all my love and support!